A Grey Ledger Society Folktale

In every age, there are bands of travelers who refuse to march in formation. Who wander the strange edges of the map, thumbing their noses at kings and monsters alike. Who weather chaos, betrayal, fire, and failure — not through brute force alone, but through audacity, absurdity, and pure, unbreakable rhythm.

Among the most legendary of these were the Mothers of Invention.

Led by the mercurial bard-artificer known as Frank Zappa, the Mothers were not a band in the simple, shallow sense. They were a high-level adventuring party: masters of improvisation, agents of musical chaos, and veterans of a thousand existential battles fought in the taverns, casinos, and dream-warped dungeons of a world tilting on the edge of the 1970s.

When the fire came, they did not break. When the commands turned impossible, they played through. When the absurdity piled higher than the towers around them, they laughed, they roared, they soloed their way out.

They were not heroes, exactly. They were something older, rougher, and more true.

Below, we record the roster of these musical adventurers — a party forged not in the fires of easy legend, but in the weird, crackling uncertainty of real, ragged survival.

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Zappa and the Mothers

Frank Zappa — The Maestro (Bard/Artificer Multiclass)

• Race: Half-Elf (charismatic, odd)
• Class: Bard (College of Lore) 10 / Artificer (Artillerist) 5
• Background: Sage (musical scholar, experimental inventor)
• Signature Spells:
  • Suggestion (to redirect the band or foes mid-fight)
  • Synaptic Static (musical psychic chaos)
  • Heat Metal (for turning a casino’s ceiling into molten lava)
• Artificer Toy: “Sound Machine” — a magical contraption that fires chaotic soundwaves.
• Vibe: The unpredictable master of ceremonies, whose improvisation can collapse realities.

George Duke — The Groove Mage (Wizard/Sorcerer)

• Race: Human
• Class: Wizard (School of Enchantment) 12 / Sorcerer (Wild Magic) 3
• Background: Entertainer
• Signature Spells:
  • Major Image (creates swirling visual hallucinations during solos)
  • Charm Person (everyone loves George)
  • Counterspell (busts hecklers mid-casting)
• Wild Magic Surge Quirk: Every time he solos, there’s a 10% chance of summoning a random elemental.

Aynsley Dunbar — The Reluctant Berserker (Fighter/Barbarian)

• Race: Half-Orc
• Class: Fighter (Battle Master) 10 / Barbarian (Totem Warrior — Bear) 5
• Background: Soldier (of the Road)
• Signature Moves:
  • Riposte (smashes through hecklers)
  • Rage Solo: Drums a literal earthquake into the ground once per long rest.
• Vibe: Deadpan fury and precise strikes — looks chill until everything explodes.

Ruth Underwood — The Percussive Trickster (Rogue/Bard)

• Race: Gnome
• Class: Rogue (Arcane Trickster) 10 / Bard (College of Valor) 5
• Background: Guild Artisan (Instrument Maker)
• Signature Tricks:
  • Mage Hand Legerdemain (uses phantom hands to play multiple instruments)
  • Cutting Words (insults enemies with polyrhythmic disses)
• Vibe: Smiling, rapid-fire chaos; the heart of the band’s rhythm and pranks.

Tom Fowler — The Bass Paladin (Paladin/Monk)

• Race: Human
• Class: Paladin (Oath of Ancients) 9 / Monk (Way of the Open Hand) 6
• Background: Hermit (spiritual bass journey)
• Signature Moves:
  • Aura of Warding (protects allies from psychic attacks during weird time signatures)
  • Flurry of Blows (bass solo style)
• Vibe: Centered, grooving protector; holds the stage together with serious serenity.

Napoleon Murphy Brock — The Voice of Thunder (Bard/Sorcerer)

• Race: Dragonborn (Bronze)
• Class: Bard (College of Glamour) 10 / Sorcerer (Storm Sorcery) 5
• Background: Folk Hero
• Signature Moves:
  • Enthralling Performance (audience stunned by vocals)
  • Lightning Bolt (shouted into a mic, pure chaos)
• Vibe: Charismatic dynamo, summons literal storms with his voice.

Ralph Humphrey — The Rhythm Tank (Cleric/Fighter)

• Race: Dwarf
• Class: Cleric (Forge Domain) 10 / Fighter (Champion) 5
• Background: Guild Artisan (Drummer’s Guild)
• Signature Moves:
  • Bless (keeps the band steady)
  • Shield of Faith (throws cymbals like shields)
• Vibe: Steadfast backbone, no-nonsense, lays down the foundations for the band and the battlefield.

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Overall Party Dynamics

• Primary Face: Zappa or Brock
• Tactical Mastermind: Zappa (but sometimes Ruth pranks him)
• Big Damage Dealer: Aynsley when he finally snaps
• Buff and Sustain: Ralph and George
• Crowd Control: Ruth and George
• Secret Boss: Zappa when he uses his full Artificer builds

Party Theme Song

“The Return of the Son of Monster Magnet” (naturally)

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Footnote: A Tale of the Kobold Chroniclers

As the casino blazed and the Mothers battled fire and confusion, a scrappy band of minstrels — cunning, nimble, and armed with sharp ears — witnessed the inferno from the shadows.

They fled the chaos, their little legs pumping, clutching fragments of melody and memory like stolen gold.

In time, they would weave these glimpses into a song — one that would echo through taverns and halls for generations.

They called it Smoke on the Water.

Thus proving that in every great legend, there are survivors who turn ash into anthems — and that not all heroes carry swords. Some just carry good timing.