By The Intrepid in PDW — 17 Jun 2025

Facing Fear: Embracing the Lizard Brain

It's natural, useful, and (sometimes) fun!

Fear is a four-letter word. It really shouldn't be.

We've turned fear into the enemy—something to conquer, eliminate, or power through. But what if we've got it all wrong? What if fear isn't the villain in our story but actually a misunderstood ally that's been trying to help us all along?

The Real Story Behind Fear

Fear gets triggered by perceived threats to two main things: our physical body and our ego or identity. That racing heart when you're about to give a presentation? Your amygdala—aka the "lizard brain"—is doing its job, completely disconnected from rational thought.

This isn't a bug in the system; it's a feature. Fear is hard-coded at the OS level of human existence. It's time we dispel the negativity around it and start seeing it for what it really is: a survival mechanism that's kept our species alive for millennia.

The problem isn't fear itself—it's how we've been taught to relate to it. We've been using fear as a motivator in all the wrong ways, like the old joke: "The floggings will continue until morale improves." That approach doesn't work for morale, and it doesn't work for fear either.

Facing Does Not Equal Conquering

Here's the thing that might blow your mind: facing your fears doesn't mean conquering them. It means developing a different relationship with them. Think of it as making peace with an overprotective friend who means well but sometimes gets a little too enthusiastic about keeping you safe.

The process breaks down into three key steps:

1. Realize You Are Feeling Fear

This sounds obvious, but it's not. Fear doesn't always show up wearing a name tag. Sometimes it masquerades as procrastination, perfectionism, or that sudden urge to reorganize your entire desk instead of tackling the important project. Learning to recognize fear in all its sneaky disguises is the first step toward working with it instead of against it.

2. Identifying Your Fears

Once you've spotted fear in the wild, it's time to get specific. What exactly are you afraid of? This is where the Downward Arrow Technique comes in handy—it's like the "five whys" from Six Sigma, but for your head.

Start with the surface fear and keep asking "What would happen if that were true?" or "What am I really afraid of here?" Keep digging until you hit the core fear underneath. Often, what we think we're afraid of (giving a bad presentation) is actually covering up a deeper fear (being judged as incompetent and losing our place in the tribe).

3. Leaning In

This is where the magic happens. Instead of trying to eliminate the fear, you lean into it. You get curious about it. You thank it for trying to protect you, and then you make a conscious choice about how to respond.

Visualization Techniques That Actually Work

Here's where things get interesting. There are two powerful visualization techniques that can help you work with fear instead of against it:

Negative Visualization

This ancient Stoic practice involves imagining the worst-case scenario in detail. Sounds counterintuitive? It's actually brilliant. By mentally rehearsing challenges, you reduce their power over you and often realize that even the worst case isn't as catastrophic as your fear makes it seem.

Valar Morguli (All Men Must Die)

Borrowed from Game of Thrones but rooted in ancient wisdom, this is about accepting the fundamental impermanence of everything. When you truly accept that all things—including your fears, your successes, and yes, even your life—are temporary, it becomes easier to take risks and make bold moves.

The Fear of Mistakes and Failures

Let's address the elephant in the room: the fear of making mistakes or failing. This might be the most paralyzing fear in our achievement-obsessed culture. But here's a radical thought: what if mistakes and failures aren't the enemy either?

Think about it like this: every mistake is data. Every failure is feedback. Every embarrassing moment is evidence that you're pushing boundaries and trying new things. The alternative—playing it safe and never risking failure—is actually the riskiest strategy of all because it guarantees you'll never reach your potential.

Remember those colorful Post-it notes? They were invented by accident when 3M was trying to create a super-strong adhesive and ended up with a weak one instead. Sometimes our biggest "failures" become our greatest innovations.

The Practical Side of Fear

So how do you actually implement this mindset shift? Start small. Pick one area where fear has been holding you back and try this approach:

Acknowledge the fear: "I notice I'm feeling scared about this presentation."

Get curious: "What am I really afraid of here? Is it the presentation itself, or is it being judged?"

Thank the fear: "Thanks, fear, for trying to keep me safe. I appreciate that you care about my reputation."

Make a conscious choice: "I'm going to do this presentation anyway because the potential upside is worth the risk."

Lean in: "I'm going to prepare well, but I'm also going to accept that I might make mistakes, and that's okay."

The Fun Factor

Here's something we rarely talk about: fear can actually be fun. Think about roller coasters, horror movies, or extreme sports. We actively seek out certain types of fear because they're thrilling. The key is learning to distinguish between useful fear (that keeps you alive) and limiting fear (that keeps you small).

When you start seeing fear as information rather than a stop sign, you might find that some of your scariest moments become your most exciting adventures.

Moving Forward

Fear isn't going anywhere. It's been with humans since we first walked upright, and it'll be with us long after we're gone. The question isn't how to eliminate it—it's how to dance with it.

Your lizard brain is going to keep doing its job, sending out alarm signals whenever it perceives a threat to your body or ego. But now you know that you don't have to be ruled by those signals. You can acknowledge them, thank them, and then make conscious choices about how to respond.

The goal isn't to become fearless. The goal is to become fear-friendly. To see fear as a conversation starter rather than a conversation ender. To use it as fuel for growth rather than a reason to stay stuck.

So the next time fear shows up—and it will—don't try to conquer it. Instead, invite it to sit down for a chat. You might be surprised by what it has to tell you.